“Happiness Inc.: Case Files – Phaseolus”
☺️ Your Mission: Manufacture Joy (No Refunds)
As Agent #427 of Happiness Corporation, you’re assigned to the sleepy (and stubbornly miserable) town of Phaseolus. Two targets:
- Jonathan Perry, the jaded bookstore owner who hasn’t smiled since his wife vanished
- Rachel Portland, the overworked diner waitress who secretly paints grotesque murals
Your tools? Corporate-approved “Joy Tactics”:
✔ Mandatory Smile Sessions (Side effects: jaw cramps)
✔ Memory Adjustments (“Remembering sadness is so inefficient!”)
✔ Community Engagement™ (Forced potlucks with mandatory fun)
📋 Features:
✔ Stalk… Er, Observe – Follow targets via hidden cameras, social media scraping, and “friendly” neighbor interrogations
✔ The Happiness Meter – Jonathan prefers privacy and tea? Too bad! Drag him to karaoke night until the meter hits green
✔ Phaseolus Secrets – Why does the town librarian burn self-help books? Who’s leaving dead roses on Rachel’s doorstep?
✔ Multiple Endings – From “Corporate Utopia” (brainwashed citizens) to “The Revolt of the Unsmiling” (torched HQ)
“Happiness isn’t a right. It’s a quota.”
🎮 Gameplay Snippets:
- 8AM: Watch Jonathan ignore his cat. Document as “resistance to feline joy.”
- 3PM: Swap Rachel’s antidepressants with experimental Happiness Gum™.
- 9PM: Attend the town’s mandatory laugh therapy (note who sobs in the bathroom).
Launch Tagline:
“You can’t buy happiness… but you can enforce it!”
*(For fans of *Papers, Please* meets Disco Elysium—with 100% more fake smiles.)*
DISCLAIMER: Happiness Corporation is not liable for existential breakdowns, spontaneous weeping, or clients developing a fear of balloons.
Will you meet quota… or burn it all down? 🔥
